Whats On My Mind

Sorry if this seem like I’m rambling and unorganized.
I’m laying in bed thinking, and I can’t help but think of the B-word.
Boys.
Although I am not in a relationship I do have guys I “talk” to. When I say guys I don’t mean like 15 different guys but I have a some who are just friends and those who want to be more then friends.
Well as of right now I am not looking for anything but friends. For one I’m only 19 years old and two I am so close to being done with school I don’t want any distractions.
Here is where my problem is. There is one guy who really likes and I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to return the same feelings but how do I know if I don’t try.? Then there is one of my ex-boyfriends. I have always tried to keep the rule of not to “recycle” my boyfriends because it just gets messy. I feel like we didn’t really try to be together for real. He wants to try again but really like be all in but I’m not sure if I can emotional deal with that. This guy means so much to me though and the time we did spend together there was something special there.
Here is my problem. Do I try to start a new spark or keep my old flame going with the risk and will burn out and I will be left cold.